Dilbert - 'At the Workplace'

• I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow is not looking good either.


• I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.


• I don't have an attitude problem. YOU have a perception problem.


• My reality cheque bounced.


• On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key.


• I don't suffer from stress. I am a carrier.


• Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, because you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.


• Never argue with idiots. They drag you down to their level, then beat you with experience.


• A pat on the back is only a few inches from a kick in the butt.


• Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.


• Only the mediocre are at their best all the time.


• There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.


• If at first you don't succeed......skydiving isn't for you.


• Life is a waste of time; time is a waste of life, so get wasted all of the time and have the time of your life.


• When everything is coming your way.....you're in the wrong lane